Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Tres Dias

A while ago I wrote about how complacent I have been feeling. Last weekend my husband went to a Tres Dias retreat and came back refreshed. Can I tell you now that having a husband who is excited about the things that God is doing sure motivates me to be a little more intentional in my relationship with my God.

I go next weekend and am hopeful that God will fan the embers of my heart into the burning flame of passion I once had. I think He is already working on it. I can't wait to fill you in on what He does!

Monday, April 12, 2010

Time-out, Time-In, Spanking and life with a pre-schooler.

Can I tell you right now that we are a sensitive family. I hate to disappoint and the idea that something I did caused someone else heartache - often makes me crumble into a blubbering fool. My son thinks that if he gets the undesired answer to his question that he has been "yelled at" and as manly as my hardworking husband is, he has a tender heart. The area of discipline is something that I have been reading up on, because we all know the horror stories of the terrible 2's.

Recently Time published this article which tells the findings of a recent study linking spanking to aggressive and violent behavior in children. What do you think? 
My husband was spanked and spanked often. Admittedly, he says he most often deserved it for being naughty and while I am sure he could pack a powerful punch he is very self controlled and has never raised a hand to me or his son. I was spanked once in my entire life and even now the spanker debates if I really deserved it. (I was probably the most perfect child ever raised. - haha) I wouldn't say that I am violent with my hands, more with my words. 

I lean more toward a no spanking philosophy, but I tell you now that I am not perfect and have smacked hands, flicked faces, and swatted a bottom. I am learning. Most of all I want my child to learn. Not to be merely punished, but taught. I want him to know that there are things that are definitly not acceptable and I also want him to have the freedom to be a rowdy little boy and not have to try to be the outwardly conforming perfect (looking) child.  

I often appreciate the perspectives found here and was really moved by what was recently shared not about spanking, but about "time-outs". 

"If you don't have the language to express your emotions,

lack impulse control,

lack maturity borne of experience,

lack the physical and mental ability to do many of the things you want to do and are therefore often frustrated,

having only lived on the planet for 900 days or so,

then you shouldn't also lack an understanding and sympathetic parent who can often mitigate those areas of need, model proper behavior, redirect you from frustrating situations, and comfort you when you need it,

instead of sending you to your room, alone and empty-handed."

Hopefully I can adapt the idea of "time-in" to my discipline techniques with maximum effectiveness, but I would also love to hear what things work for you! 

Friday, April 02, 2010

Getting past the complacency...

Easter should be a very important day for the believer, but for me, this year, it seems kind of lame. Before you shout blasphemy, I in no way think my "feelings" minimize the amazing sacrifice that Christ gave or negate that he DID indeed rise from the dead, to life, and is ALIVE today. My belief remains, but my passion has waned. I am complacent.

I am hungry, but not fed. The bread of life has become no longer a necessity, but a chore. I am lukewarm. I am not sinning in the sense that my outward actions show that my heart is far from the lord. In fact, I honestly don't think I am far from Him. I just think that I have a hard time knowing if I am living in Him, or just going through the motions.

We try to make Him a priority every day. I try to teach my son about the Creator. We pray together as a family, we pray together as a couple, I pray. Perhaps, the reason that everyone else is making a big deal about Jesus this week/weekend makes me want to do it less, because I want to worship Him daily and not just be an Easter and Christmas kind of Christian. I don't know. What is my deal?

Have you struggled with this? I want to be passionate for my Lord again, but I don't want it to hurt (very much). How have you gotten past a season of complacency with your God? How do you keep Christ central not just at Easter (but some help there would be nice), but everyday?

What are you doing this weekend to remember what He gave for you, instead of getting used to hearing the story and losing your passion?

For now I will rejoice in the little things; the laughter with family, the joy of spring, and hope that God will open my eyes to the beautiful sacrifice He made for me.

For now I will meditate on my favorite hymn: