Tuesday, July 08, 2008
Just when I am settling in to a consistent life something major happens and I have to reevaluate. This time welcoming our bundle of joy has toppled my idea of "who I am". Now, I am searching for my script in this act of the play and hoping that the understudy will shoot me some lines quick. Perhaps it is time for some introspection.
Who I used to be:
1. Romantic, thoughtful, sassy wife
2. Horrible Housekeeper
3. Worried about what other people "my age" thought of me
4. Inconsistent exerciser
5. Lover of junkfood / hater of healthfood
7. Consistent Bible reader
8. Camp girl
9. Too busy for people
10. Searching for a way to express God's truth to people.
Who I am now:
1. Tired wife hoping to romance again
2. Mediocre housekeeper
3. Glad that I have a handsome baby boy who gets boogers and vomit all over me.
4. Even more inconsistent exerciser
5. More self disciplined and I can't believe I order salads now.
6. Exhausted, but happy
7. Inconsistent Bible reader, but better prayer.
8. Camp support girl
9. Wishing people weren't too busy for me.
10. Searching for ways to express God's love to people, especially my son.
Who I want to be:
1. Romantic, thoughtful, caring wife
2. GREAT housekeeper
3. Happy with who I am and who God made me to be
6. Rested, Active, and Fun
7. Worshiper in Spirit and Truth
8. Involved in something worthwhile whether it be camp or elsewhere.
9. Able to give to others just a sample of what amazing people have given to me.
10. Living life so that people cannot deny God's love or truth in my life.
Hmmm... maybe not helpful to you, but good for me to see that in some ways I'm moving forward. It is amazing that 10 years ago these sort of thoughts never would have crossed my mind, but now life's purposes seem to evolve little by little each step of the way. It is good for me not to grow complacent and comfortable in my life. It is healthy for me to not have the earthly security I so long for. I will never have all my "ducks in a row" and that keeps me grasping to the security of Christ. So with that "I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus". Phl 3:14
With that goodnight. I've gotta sleep while I can