Monday, November 05, 2007

Can I just vent? Christianity, Church, and Communism

So I have again neglected the blogging world for some time, but instead of a clever update today you get my rant. I often hate blogs because they are sometimes discouraging because you only hear the raw emotion of a persons current issue, however today I join that group. I figure one can't hurt. Only my family reads this anyway, and Rachel... So, here it is.

If you are a Christian, people expect you to have it all together or else you are that dreaded "hypocrite" that noone wants to be. But if you try to look like you've got it all together people think you are not "authentic". Arghhh. So my dilema is how do I get it right? If people know me they know that I am a little bit of a freak show. I've got my own issues and things that I am trying to let God work out in me. No I do not want to be the sarcastic, cruel, unloving Jesica that lurks within. I long to be the girl who only cares about Christ and what he thinks about me, but I screw up. People screw up... that is why we need Jesus. And, why can't I talk about God without being considered "religious".
That brings up a whole new issue about religion versus a life changing relationship. So, ok it is easy to fall into religion - A "Christian looks like this..." but I don't want that because it is death to joy. Frankly I hate church. There it's out. I love the people in my church and I enjoy learning from a good teacher, but if a person is making a decision about the person of Jesus by what they experience on a typical Sunday morning service -that is frightening. All that said my closing thought is: if you wonder about God don't look at me, look at Jesus. Read the Bible. Learn about the real Jesus - not the one that sunday school taught you or the one that your humanities prof taught you. If you want to find out why we need Jesus - look at me before and after - then deny his life changing work.

This ends my random rant and does anyone else think that with all the political debate - our democracy is quickly being morphed into socialism / communism? Just curious. I read a good editorial this weekend and it made me wonder about that, I think I am being swayed to vote for Ron Paul. And you?

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